


Going Home

by Jestana



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Don't copy to another site, F/M, Gen, Soulmates, sort of soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2021-01-02 12:15:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21161510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jestana/pseuds/Jestana
Summary: After ten years away, Terry Ryder finally goes home.





	Going Home

**Author's Note:**

> This is a prequel to [Meeting Your Match](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16441784). It expands on one of Alec Ryder's memories that we can see in the game. Terry is a trans woman and when she came out to Alec as a teenager, he reflexively denied it. Terry left and hasn't seen or talked to him since then. In the ten years that have passed, she fully transitioned and she's only going home because Ellen's sick.
> 
> In this 'verse, most humans don't see colors until they meet a potential match and even then it's only one or two colors. As they get to know their potential match, they start to see more and more colors. If their match dies before they do, they stop seeing colors. Since this is before the main story, Terry hasn't met Suvi yet, so the world is just shades of gray for her.

Terry Ryder peered out the window as the shuttle descended through Earth's atmosphere. She'd only visited a few times as she'd grown up and she was a very different person now since her last visit around the age of sixteen. It was even more beautiful than she'd remembered. Her mother had described it once as a blue and green marble with swirls of white, but it was all just shades of gray to Terry. She hoped to one day see the blue and green Ellen had described. For now, she watched as the transport slowly descended and settled on the landing pad. Picking up her duffle bag and slinging it over her shoulder, Terry joined the slow shuffle off the transport. As she entered the main terminal, she began to look around in earnest. Her brother had _said_ he would pick her up. "Terry! Over here!"

"Freddy!" For once, she didn't care about the people around them as she hurried forward to hug her brother tight. "I've missed you."

He nudged her forehead with his, grinning. "Missed you more."

"Missed you _most_," she countered with a soft laugh.

Laughing as well, Freddy led her over to pick up her suitcase, insisting on carrying it for her. "You have your duffle. I got this."

"Fine." Amused, she looped her arm through his free one.

He smiled, guiding her outside to where he'd parked the family car. "So gracious."

"Of course!" Terry answered with a cheerful smile, tossing her duffle bag in the trunk once he'd put her suitcase inside. In the car and on their way, she asked quietly, "How's Mom doing?"

Freddy's perpetual small smile faded. "She's... diminished. The AEND has taken its toll, but she's staying positive."

"Of course she is." Terry sighed, trying to enjoy the scenery they passed. It'd been a long time since she'd last seen it. "And... Dad? How is he?"

Quietly, he told her, "Obsessed with that AI he's been developing. He spends most of his time in the lab tinkering with it."

"Does he know?" She asked, clasping her hands together in her lap, very nervous. "About me finishing my transition?"

Freddy sighed. "Yes, and we showed him your picture. All he said was, 'Terry always looked good.'"

"That's not the _worst_ thing he could've said," Terry pointed out, squeezing her hands together tightly. "Not what I _hoped_ for, though."

He parked in front of the family cabin and turned to face her. "Terry, you don't _have_ to do this."

"Yes, I do, Freddy," she countered, turning to face him in turn. "I'm _done_ begging for anyone's approval. If he doesn't like me coming to see Mom, that's _his_ problem, not mine."

Freddy started at her for a long moment, and then smiled. "It's your choice, of course."

"Damn right it is." She climbed out of the car and moved to the back to grab her things. "I know you're trying to protect me, Freddy, but I can do this."

Laughing, he politely took her suitcase from her. "Yes, Terry."

"Terry?" Ellen Ryder's voice distracted Terry from objecting and she turned in place, her heartbeat speeding up.

On the front porch stood a familiar figure, a smile lighting her face. Tears stinging her eyes, Terry quickly crossed to the porch and hugged Ellen as tightly as she dared, whispering hoarsely, "Mom."

"I've missed you so much," Ellen whispered, hugging Terry tightly as she could. "Emails and comms just aren't the same."

Her tears falling freely, Terry managed to choke out, "Same, Mom."

"Gee, Terry, did you miss Mom?" Freddy asked cheerfully as he joined them.

Laughing, Terry gently eased back from the hug, signing to her brother as she did: "Fuck off."

"Language, Terry," Ellen scolded with a feigned glare. "I taught you better than that." She cupped Terry's cheek with one hand. "You _look_ happier, all things considered."

Terry smiled down at her mother. "I _am_ happier, Mom. I'm _me_ now."

"Good." Ellen drew her head down to press their foreheads together. "That's all I ever wanted for you." She smiled up at Freddy. "_Both_ of you."

Grinning, he bent to press his forehead to Ellen's once Terry stepped back. "Love you, Mom."

"Oh, yeah. Me, too," Terry quickly added, following them into the cabin.

It was as small and cozy as she remembered from their few vacation trips to Earth. The old, comfortably-worn furniture had been embellished by the addition of pillows. "I hope you don't mind sharing with Freddy again, Terry."

"Of course not." She smiled fondly at her brother. "We've _always_ shared."

He grinned back at her. "Yep. _Always_."

"Good, go put your things down and freshen up if you need to," Ellen told them, sitting in the armchair. "I'll wait out here."

They wasted no time taking Terry's duffle and suitcase to their bedroom. Putting both on Terry's bed, she dug out her make up bag and took it into the bathroom. Once she'd touched up her makeup, Terry returned to the living room to find her mother and brother talking quietly as they waited for her. Both looked up with reassuring smiles. "Ready to see Dad?"

"No, but I never _will_ be, so let's just get it over with." Terry tugged at the hem of her shirt, nervous about seeing her father again after ten years of no contact.

Ellen smiled understandingly as Freddy helped her stand up. "It'll be fine, Terry. Trust me."

"I wish I could, Mom." She smiled apologetically as she took Ellen's other hand.

Freddy grinned at her over their mother's head. "Let's get it over with, hmm?"

"Yes, probably for the best." Ellen led them out the back door and across the yard to the shed that Alec had turned into a lab once Terry and Freddy were too old to use it as a play area.

Following her mother and brother inside, Terry's attention was immediately caught by the sight of her father at a workstation, head bent over the computer terminal that sat on top of it. She noted that the once-black hair was now liberally streaked with gray. Freddy's habitual cheer sounded a little forced as he said, "Hey, Dad."

"Hi, Freddy," Alec answered absently, picking up a datapad to begin tapping away on it, never once looking up.

Ellen sighed and shook her head. She turned and gestured at Terry. Very nervous, she joined her brother and said, "Hi, Dad."

"Terry?" He finally stopped working and looked up at her. She refused to cower or flinch away as Alec Ryder looked her up and down. Besides the gray streaking his hair, stress lines now bracketed his nose and mouth as well as lined his forehead. A small smile curved his mouth, easing the stress lines, but deepening the laugh lines by his eyes. "You look well."

Her heart sank at the general neutrality of his comment, but his smile was a little encouraging. "Yes, I'm good, Dad."

"Good, good." He nodded looking back by at the computer terminal on his workstation.

Freddy gave an exasperated sigh and shook his head. He caught Terry's eye and signed, "See? He's focused on _that_."

"Finally," Ellen's voice was, perhaps, a _little_ too loud. "The Ryder clan is in one room. Feels like it's been years since we were all together."

Alec glanced up, distracted, as Freddy added facetiously, "Or more."

"Well, I'll take whatever I can get," Ellen returned with a sharp look for her son, not rising to his bait. "I've missed you two."

Terry, for lack of anything else to say, asked, "How are you feeling, Mom?"

"Nope, we're not doing that," Ellen replied, signing 'no' as she shook her head firmly. "Only one rule for this visit: no talking about me. I'm fine." Alec looked back down at his work, but didn't pick up the datapad he'd set down. "And when I'm not, the pills help. Deal?"

Reluctantly, Terry nodded. "Okay."

"Fine." Freddy sighed heavily.

Ellen nodded, smiling warmly at them. "Good. Let's talk about something else." She took a step towards the workstation. "Alec?"

"Uh..." he looked up, glancing between Terry and Freddy, clearly racking his brain for something to say.

Ellen, her hand resting on Terry's back, gave him a Look. "Really?"

"Well. You're both, uh, looking... taller," Alec finally said as Terry leaned on the end of his workstation.

Freddy, his arms folded across his chest, gave him a sardonic look. "Yeah, Dad. That _does_ tend to happen."

"Right, right." Alec glanced down at his workstation, rubbing the back of his neck. "I know. So, uh..." None of them spoke, making him think of something to say for once. Finally, Alec looked up at Freddy. "I heard the Alliance has a new Mako in the works."

Freddy nodded, perking up. "Yeah, word is, they can air-drop _this_ one from a ship."

"I know!" Terry was relieved that Freddy had heard the same rumors. It meant they were more likely to be true. "They're saying we might get one on our next expedition."

Alec's next question indicated that either Freddy or Ellen had been keeping him posted on her training and work: "You're still poking around the Attican Traverse?"

"It's amazing!" She told him, leaning forward in her eagerness to finally _tell_ him something herself. "We think we might've found a Prothean site." Reluctantly, she added, "No artifacts yet, but we're still digging."

He smiled nostalgically. "I remember the day they found the first ruins on Mars. Changed my life--" he glanced at each of them, sharing a knowing smile with Ellen. "We knew for _sure_ that aliens were real. We just had to go find them."

"Yes!" Freddy leaned forward on the workstation, gesturing as he talked. "Every day, I wake up, I'm looking at that mass relay and I keep thinking: what's on the other side?"

Alec reached up to rest a hand on each of their shoulders, his eyes intense as he looked between them. "Don't lose that. The minute you stop wondering what's beyond the mountain, you die a little inside."

"No chance of that," Terry replied, some of her nerves fading at the touch of her father's hand. "It's in our blood--you infected us."

Freddy leaned even further forward, his eyes as intense as their father's. "What was it like, Dad? When you went through that first relay?"

"Don't believe the stories," he answered with a laugh. "The Charon relay scared the _shit_ out of us." He gave them a conspiratorial smile. "Admiral Grissom included." As they laughed, he continued, "Why don't we go have this dinner your mom's been slaving over all day and I'll tell you about it?"

Nodding, Terry and Freddy left the lab ahead of Alec and Ellen. Glancing back at her parents, Terry's heart ached at the sight of Alec with his arm around Ellen's shoulders and hers around his waist. Quickly blinking back tears of longing, Terry slipped her arm through Freddy's. _I wish I could see colors._

*

_Alec Ryder's Personal Logs_

Terry came home today. It's the first time we've seen each other since she came out to me. I admit, I was an idiot. She just caught me off-guard and I didn't stop to think. The look on her face... I might as well have slapped her. I wanted to apologize, god, how I wanted to, but an emergency came up that I couldn't ignore. Then we were never on the Citadel at the same time long enough for us to meet up. Then she left for training and that put an end to any chances to see her again. Ellen and Freddy have kept in touch with her at least, so I know how well she's been doing, but I've missed talking to her. After her transition, she sent Ellen a picture, but it didn't prepare me for seeing her in person. She's grown into a beautiful, strong young woman and I couldn't be prouder of her. Still, face-to-face with my daughter at last and I didn't know what to say. How to begin to apologize for being an idiot after all these years. So I... didn't. I just acted like everything was fine between us. I know I disappointed her with my lack of reaction, but she went along with it. Someday, we'll have to sit down and talk it out. I'm not sure when that will be, though.

Dunn's agreed to a scouting mission on Habitat 7. I'm gearing up now. I'm worried about Freddy. Dr. T'Perro says he'll be fine, but... he's my son. How can I not worry? It's these moments when you wish you'd told your children you loved them more often. Or ever. Which brings me to the tough part: Kids, if anything happens to me, there are... things you're going to find out. I hope you understand. Terry, I'm sorry for how I reacted when you came out to me. You surprised me, but that's no excuse. I have _always_ been proud to call you my daughter. Freddy, I'm proud of how supportive you've been of both your sister and your mother. I love you both very much and I always have. Never forget that.

**Author's Note:**

> Terry and Freddy use sign language because they both had ear infections when they were kids and lost over 50% of their hearing. Since this was still the early days of humanity's membership in the Alliance, non-human doctors didn't know human biology enough to offer treatments that would correct the loss and human medicine could only offer cochlear implants. Alec and Ellen couldn't afford them for both twins. So the entire family learned sign language and the twins how to read lips. In time, Alliance doctors advanced their understanding enough to properly correct Terry and Freddy's hearing loss.
> 
> The first log I included is what would have been decrypted after Terry watched the memory of the family gathering. The second log, Terry would have been able to hear once she had access to Alec's quarters on the _Hyperion_. Let's just say that she had a bit of a cry after listening to it. **ETA:** I edited Alec's logs a little to make things clearer.


End file.
